Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
