Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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