big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Randomize
