It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
