Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
We are all done wearing pants today
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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