I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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