ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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