So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize