I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Randomize
