idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
