i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize