I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Randomize
