carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
