at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
