If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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