what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Randomize
