just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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