why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
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