K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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