I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
This is the prime rib incident all over again
So many bounce houses so little time
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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