I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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