We won't sleep together?
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
