If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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