it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
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