this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Enjoy the penises
Randomize