? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
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