I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
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