Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
