belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize
