Small penises have feelings too.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Randomize
