she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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