I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Randomize