You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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