Do you still have your period?
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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