hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
