that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
