oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize