pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
