Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Randomize
