you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize
