I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
