Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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