you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
