She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
