I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Randomize
