I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
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