he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
