I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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