I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
