babies were throwing up all over the place
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
he's gonorrhea incarnate
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
