I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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