Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
